2021.

After 3 months into the year of 2022, I am back with another annual "what did this year teach me?" post for 2021; long overdue, I know, but here we are.

Hi! I hope you are doing well, and I hope the year of 2021 was productive for you, in all the areas of your life that needed it. Let's jump straight into it :)

Here are 5 lessons that the year 2021 taught me:

1) Protect your peace

What you share with other people does matter, but what matters more is WHO you share things with. People that drain your energy, that leech off of you, only to find betterment for themselves, do not deserve your time and effort. It is so important to protect what brings you peace. External forces are always colliding with us, but it is in our control to decide whether we want those forces to interfere with our peace. Protect what is important to you, protect what you believe in, protect your energy.

It is astounding how many people look at us in the wrong way, with negative intentions. What's more astounding is that these people are often the ones we trust the most, that we consider family. It is natural for humans to feel jealous or envy those around them, but those energies are the ones we need to protect ourselves from.

This can mean maybe not sharing everything with everyone. As conservative as it may seem, this also means keeping your emotional guard up from people whom you know will not respect your feelings. Choose your inner circle wisely, they DO reflect the person you become. Make sure these people are in it for the friendship and not any other gains. Remember that it is better to be alone than to be with people that do not serve your purpose. Protect your peace.

2) Nothing is more important than your mental and physical health

There is NOBODY, I repeat NOBODY, worth losing sleep over. Not a single person, no matter how important they are to you, is worth staying up all night for (in the sense that this person does not reciprocate your actions and emotions). The people that want to show up in your life will make the effort to do so. Crying over someone who clearly does not respect your time and energy as much as you do theirs, is seriously not worth it sis. Go to sleep. Those people that use you and your kindness to benefit themselves or because they are "bored" are not worth it. You can find someone better, you can do much better.

With that, your mental health comes before every relationship, every assignment, every tournament, etc. If you are not at peace with your mind, if you cannot find a healthy outlet for your emotions, then you cannot love those around you and you cannot love yourself in the best way. It is important to remember that YOU live with the decisions that you make. So to make the best decisions for you at that particular time, it is important to make sure your physical and mental health are at the best they can be.

It is okay to show emotion, no matter your gender. We live in a society that forces men to be strong and women are portrayed as "emotional", and all of these are translated into trauma experiences from an early age that reflect onto your later life. You are not weak because you cry, or because you reach out to someone for help. We are all HUMAN before we are fathers, mothers, children, siblings, spouses, etc. How can you live with yourself if the decisions you make are for other people and not for yourself?

3) "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift that is why they call it the present".

Focus on the present. Cultivate the NOW. Stop worrying about things that you cannot control down the road. You can't see tomorrow so why worry about it? I spent 80% of this year worrying about my future. What am I gonna do? What if I don't end up where I am supposed to be? What if I turn out to be a failure to my parents? How can I live with that guilt? I spiraled down this rabbit hole that made my mental health drop so low that I kept waking up in the middle of the night and had to tell myself to STOP.

So, stop. Take it slow. I'm sorry but you can't see where you end up. But its not about the destination... it is about the journey. Enjoy the journey. Enjoy your time now. Do the best you can, everything else will work itself out.

Learn from yesterday to do the work now for the future tomorrow.

4) Figure out your happiness formula

The things that make me happy in life may not be the same ones that make you happy. Even within your own family, what you consider your top priority is not the same as what your mom considers her top priority. The CEO of Nabil Bank in Nepal, Anil Keshary Shah, sums this up extremely well during his podcast interview with vlogger and content creator Sisan Baniya (which you can view here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=47LhO-zR6Ns&ab_channel=ParadygmPodcasts around 46:00)

1. Family and Friends: for some people, everything that they do is centered around their family and friends. Someone goes to see a movie and they immediately think "I loved that, I'll come see it with my friends and it will be even more fun" or someone goes to a wonderful place and thinks "oh wow this place is amazing, I'm going to bring my entire family with me next time". For others, family and friends might be a part of their lives, but not the most important aspect. What about you? How important are family and friends for you?

2. Money and economic wealth: for some people the more money they have, the happier they are. The more shares they have, the more income coming into their bank accounts, the happier they are. For these people, money is bigger than all else. For others, money management might give them a big headache, or having possession of such a large sum of money might make them anxious, so they don't deem this aspect to be the most important. What about you? How important is money for you?

3. Health (physical, psychological, emotional): how much time do you give yourself to focus on your health? Do you meditate? Do yoga? What are your eating and sleeping habits? Do you have a safe outlet for your emotions? For physical health: find exercises or a routine that suits you and keep it CONSISTENT. If you make a habit to walk every morning, work to keep that habit consistent for years not days. For psychological health: find an activity for your thoughts. Whether that is prayer or seeing a therapist, find some place to center yourself. For emotional health: find an outlet for your feelings. This can be anything from journaling to starting a podcast, or even seeking someone that is willing to speak with you about your emotions. Even our pets can be that outlet. There are 14 year old's that do yoga and meditate, and there are other 14 year old's that go out eating whatever drinking whatever doing whatever, which is also okay because that is their choice. What about you? How important is health for you?

4. Power, Status, Authority: this one is actually deeply related to our egos and pride. There are a lot of people who spend time investing in things that lift their status in the public eye. If Leonardo Di Caprio was walking down the street and nobody came up to him asking for an autograph or a selfie, how do you think he would feel? If the President of The United States wasn't given the respect he deserves or had his power taken away from him, how do you think he would feel? If power, status, authority is important for you, how are you investing time in this aspect? A lot of people do not like the spotlight though, and that is okay. What about you? How important is power and authority for you?

5. Your relationship with yourself, God, and the greater good: when was the last time you sat down and had a conversation with yourself? When was the last time you sat down and asked yourself the essential questions: how am I doing? what do I want? what are my beliefs? It doesn't matter if you make others feel happy, if you can't invest in yourself and your happiness, then you'll always feel a little empty on the inside. Robin Williams made the world laugh, but ended up committing suicide. What was wrong? His relationship with himself wasn't strong enough. What about you? How important is your relationship with yourself for you? Along those lines, it is important to know the relationship you have with your Aatma (soul), your Aatma's relationship with Parmatma (God or a higher power), and then your relationship with the greater good. What are your core beliefs? What is your philosophy of life? What does greater good mean to you in the time that you are at in your life right now? How can you contribute to the greater good? Some people might believe that greater good is personal, and others might believe that greater good is external. What about you? How important are these beliefs and relationships for you?

The biggest thing about this happiness formula is BALANCE. You do need all 5 of these points in your life, but it is up to YOU (not your mom, not your dad, not your sibling) to figure out how much you want to invest in each. If you are focused on one part and neglect everything else, then you won't be able to stay on the path to happiness. Figure out the ratio of your happiness formula.

5) Indulge in the unknown

With all the challenges that have come up in 2021, the biggest one has been the unknown. Moving to a new place, with new people, studying something new, it was all very intimidating for me. Overall, I let the fear get to me, and I focused on the negatives more than finding the positives. How boring would life be if all we did was what we were comfortable with? The same stuff every day, dang that's so lame. Let's jump off a cliff once in a while, keep life interesting.

I am reminded of this dialogue from Night At The Museum:

["It's time for your next adventure...

I have no idea what I'm going to do tomorrow...

How exciting!"] ;)

Wishing you and your loved ones an exciting rest of 2022!